On Friday I explained that an agent who rejects your book will take every possible measure to ensure that you remain enthusiastic about writing. Bizarrely, they will want you to remain convinced that you are about to make your fortune as a bestselling author.
This means that if you have written a bad book – derivative say, or repetitive, or boring, or incomprehensible – the agent will not tell you. That's fair enough. (S)he wants to catch the bus home unmolested by disillusioned manuscript-wielding fanatics.
So who will tell you? Ah, you say, your family will tell you! Your friends!
Ha ha you're so wrong! Your family will think the book is fantastic. (If they don't they're bankers anyway and they never loved you). Your friends may be a little more ambivalent but they too will be reluctant to let you know it's rubbish. Think about it. Would you like to be the one to shatter your best friend's dreams?
No, I didn't think so.
This is why all the tip sheets for submitting to agents tell you to refrain from quoting your Ma/best friend/pet dog in your query letter unless your Ma is Maeve Binchy.
So we're back to square one.
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